words Sarah Bagharib

That’s the overenthusiastic Sag in me announcing my birthday in case you haven’t noticed! I never thought I’d announce it with multiple exclamation marks though because this was my reflection about turning 30 two years ago:

I mean hey, turning 30 IS a milestone even for those who aren’t big on birthdays (like I am… clearly) But the funny thing is, I’m not feeling anxious about entering my thirties the way I thought I would when I wrote that a couple of years ago. To be honest, it was mainly because of how I perceived those 30 Under 30 lists; gosh they can be so unhealthy when you choose to benchmark your success against how much others have accomplished within a similar amount of time.

I turn 30 today and I actually feel like I can finally step into my power.

Most likely because this year has been all about healing for me. I spent a lot of this year sitting with my feelings; such a long time coming and this is truly one of the silver linings of this pandemic. It’s been the most difficult and uncomfortable process but it’s completely worth it. I unpacked all the different thoughts and emotions I’ve compartmentalised over the past decade (and beyond) including the grief I hadn’t quite processed since my aunt passed eight years ago.

Have I completely healed?

Absolutely not, but I’m making progress and that’s something I'm celebrating. I’m slowly managing my anxiety, embracing my truths, reconciling with my identity, and through this being a lot more self-aware of my triggers, strengths, weaknesses, all of it!

It’s also funny how I started Crazycat exactly three years ago on my 27th birthday (yes! Crazycat turns 3 today too!) with the intention of making other women feel less alone on their unique journeys. It was born out of my own journey of self-discovery and learning what it means to be a woman. I’ve definitely grown with this community and platform over the years –– from being a newly-married woman who had a new job, was living in a new home and had new identities, to rediscovering myself as a new mum, and then a working mum who’s now also an entrepreneur on the side!

I formalised this little platform, friends!!

I am also eternally grateful for all the women I’ve met…

… because of Crazycat the past three years and the new friendships formed because of it too.

Not many know this, but it’s also because of Crazycat that I was given the opportunity to host a talk show about women, by women called Wahhhnita!

I’m now really excited about taking this platform to the next level with my wonderful team and I hope that if you’ve been a part of this community the past few years, you’ll continue to grow with us on our journey. In the meantime, I thought I’d share a little something that’s been helping me a lot recently —

Here are some of the things that have helped me unpack my anxiety about turning 30: 

1. Streamlining your energy
   
   I learned to let go of all that no longer serves me. I used to care so much about what others think of me and this used to get in my way. I believe that part of that begins with acceptance. As you grow into yourself, you should always give yourself permission to feel and accept what you go through before anything else. To me, that’s where you start to streamline your energy — spend more time and energy on what gives you meaning.
   
   2. Boundaries are so important!
   
   Learned this a lot since I became a mum — I’ve learned to say no, I’ve learned to not give in to my FOMO. I have learnt to treat others the way I wish to be treated. All including mutually inclusive, accepting and respectful behaviours for myself and for everyone else around me. This has become such a key part of self-care.
   
   3. Living La Vida Loca!
   
   This was something my therapist helped me realise and understand — we’ve heard it all before, “life’s too short”. That isn’t a cop-out by the way but it is intended to help you seize the moment and create purpose. Life can get busy. So, I have decided that when I view the larger extent of my life, I want to be able to remember the best parts of it.

And to sum up my first day as a 30-year-old:

To those who are turning 30 and feeling anxious about it, I hope you know that we’re truly still at the beginning! The twenties was awkward and all sorts of confusing and now having arrived at age 30, I’m so ready to claim my space and take as many women as I can with me on this journey and help them claim their space too. With turning 30 and Crazycat turning 3, we decided to celebrate growth for the month of December! We are taking time to acknowledge everything that has led us to this or any moment in our lives from small milestones to big steps. Here’s to a better 2021!