5 Things That Do Not Determine Your Self-Worth

What not to think about when you think about your self-worth.

words Zahwah Bagharib

I don’t think I’m alone when I say that I’ve been struggling with self-worth recently. I don’t know how it started, or why I’ve allowed myself to let things or other people define who I am. It may be because I’m not always so sure about myself, but that’s okay. I believe it’s a journey, to work towards stepping into your power and recognising and celebrating your own strengths.

When you ask yourself “What defines me? How am I measuring my self-worth?” are you able to find a straightforward answer? If not, one way to look at it is to know that there are definitely things that do not determine your self-worth. Here are 5 of them (and these are reminders for myself, first and foremost).

The Quality of Your Work

You may be good at what you do, and that’s excellent. But if you’re not - that’s completely okay too. Your output should not reflect who you are as a person or what you are capable of doing. There are some days where you’re not able to give your 100%, but instead of beating yourself up, you can be kind to yourself, take a step back and breathe. We can try again tomorrow.

Your Job

It’s hard to think that you’re not just an administrative staff, or a stay-at-home mum, or a creative designer. Your self-worth is not tied to your career, even when you work more than 5 days a week or 8 hours a day. You’re allowed to follow your dreams and climb that corporate ladder, but at the end of the day, your job doesn’t define you -- you are defined by your values, your beliefs, and ultimately, who you are and what you love.

How Others Perceive You

Everyone around you has their own opinions (and don’t get me wrong, they’re entitled to them) but that doesn’t mean you should let them define you.

You are not what they say about you and you are definitely not what they think you are.

It may be hard to shut them out, but one thing that we could try is positive self-talk. Whenever you’re affected by someone else’s words or actions, remind yourself that you are so much more than how they made you feel and that you’ve got amazing friends and family who love you for who you are.

Your Relationship Status

Single, divorced, or even married -- your relationship status does not define you. What I love about what we do here at Crazycat is how we share stories of women from all walks of life, and you never have to wonder “Is she married? Does she have kids?” because these everyday women are defined by their strengths and unique journeys -- and so are we.

Your Past

Whatever you’ve been through, your past does not define you or your self-worth. You may have been scarred or gone through experiences that have swallowed your self-worth or identity, but I’m here to tell you that there is so much ahead of you. Let the past stay in the past, and focus on the present and what’s to come. Believe that your journey isn’t over yet and that your past has made you even stronger.

After reflecting on this again, if you asked me what defines my self-worth, I’m going to tell you that it’s me. I define my self-worth. Not my job, not the work I produce, or what people think of me. I know that I’m worthy and capable, and I’m not going to let anyone or anything make me feel otherwise.