4 Ways to Process Your Feelings
It’s time to sit down with your emotions.
words Zahwah Bagharib
The first half of 2021 has been quite a lot for me as I rode on an emotional roller coaster ride. There were many days when I thought that my head would explode as it was filled with a hundred and one things. There were also days where I ended up breaking down as I was too overwhelmed with everything that was happening around or within me. It was a difficult phase for me as I was juggling my career, family and transitions into marriage and a new job.
Looking back, I may or may not have processed my emotions well. I recall myself lashing out at my loved ones, lazing around and not getting anything done or basically, allowing my emotions to get the best of me. Either way, it was a learning journey for me and I now realise how important it is to know how to manage and process my feelings. Today, I may not be a complete expert at processing my emotions, but I think I’ve comprehended the basics which have definitely helped me.
To whoever is reading this, if you’re going through a lot right now, I hope you know that it is completely okay to feel. Some days, our feelings may get the best of us, and that’s okay. Feelings are a lot, but knowing how to manage them can help us in the long run. Here are some ways that I’ve learnt to cope with and process my feelings.
Cry It Out
Sometimes, all we need is a good and long cry, especially when you’ve been keeping it in or trying to keep it together for quite some time. Crying doesn’t make you weak, it just makes you human. After a good crying session, I always feel a lot better and my head starts to clear up. I’m also able to slowly process my thoughts (and here are more benefits of crying!) and feel like a huge burden has been lifted off my shoulders. If it helps, you don’t have to cry alone. You can also cry to a loved one and know that you are not alone in these dark moments.
Ask Yourself Why
Once you’ve calmed yourself down, you can start asking yourself some questions. Why am I feeling this way? How long have I been feeling this way? What were some of the triggers? If some of these questions are still quite heavy for you, you can always take it slow. Remember, processing your emotions isn’t an easy thing to do. Take your time and know that you are allowed to understand and manage your emotions at your own pace. Asking yourself certain questions will allow you to understand and align your thoughts and feelings better.
Journal
Journaling your emotions or writing out your thoughts can also help in processing how you’re feeling at that very moment. You can journal in many ways such as writing in a notebook or even typing it out on your laptop or private blog. Sometimes, when you see your thoughts and emotions in words on a piece of paper or your screen, you may feel a lot calmer as they’re no longer just a mess of things in your head. Your feelings make sense and they are absolutely valid -- don’t be afraid to let them out or in this case, write it out.
To get you started, here are some ways to start journaling and while you’re at it, you might also want to read more about the other benefits of journaling here.
Talk to Someone
What I’ve realised when I was trying to process my emotions, again and again, was that it helped so much to be able to go through it with someone. I have been so fortunate to have people in my life who truly care about me and who are willing to walk with me through my thoughts and emotions. You’d be surprised at how much a listening ear could mean to you, not advice, not suggestions -- but a listening ear. Someone who can listen without judging, and someone who allows you to acknowledge your emotions. One thing to note is that letting out your emotions to someone is completely different from lashing out or venting your emotions. We shouldn’t lash out at someone open and willing to hear us out, but instead, breathe, and slowly let them know how you are feeling. Know that they’re on your side, and not against you.
If you’re looking for someone to talk to, you can always reach out to us on Instagram or drop us an email at hello@crazycat.com. Pen your thoughts or tell us how you’re feeling. We are always here for you and we will be here to remind you that you are never alone in this journey.
Now that you understand a little bit better how to manage your emotions, there are still a lot of people out there who are struggling to do so. Maybe they weren’t raised in a manner where processing their emotions was a norm (and that’s okay and not on them!), or maybe they just don’t know how to, and they may end up hurting people in the process. Let’s help them out and remind them firstly that their emotions are valid and that it is completely okay to sit with their feelings. Be a listening ear for the people around you and watch your relationships grow stronger and healthier. Everyone is going through something, so let’s be kind and be there for one another.
A big thank you to my sister Sarah who taught me how to manage my emotions as I navigated through such a turbulent phase in my life. Thank you for always being there for me.
How to get help?
If you are or someone you know is in need of someone to talk to or may need further mental health support, please call these hotlines and support numbers:
AWARE – 1800 777 5555 (Monday – Friday, 10 am – 6 pm)
ComCare Call - 1800 222 0000
PAVE - 6555 0390
TRANS Family Services - 6449 9088
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Zahwah is a self-taught digital marketer, cupcake monster and enjoys writing in her free time.