I Am Working On My Ideal Life
And no, I’m not talking about success.
words Zahwah Bagharib
To me, a part of my ideal life is being okay with the fact that I don’t feel like getting any work done today. Or the fact that I yearn for Friday night movies and Sunday brunches. I don’t think my ideal life has anything to do with success or becoming what my parents envisioned me to be. I think it’s more about finding peace and doing a lot of the little things I love.
I have a feeling that my older self would tell me that this is actually the best time of my life. I’m married to my best friend (with no responsibilities of being a mom just yet), I’ve got a stable job that allows me to work from home, I’ve yet to give up on my weekly jogs, I’m learning to love how to cook… so why does it not feel like the best time of my life?
I think the answers revolve around the fact that there are things in my way. Be it people, my insecurities, my past or even my lazy ass who refuses to go out there and make it the best time of my life.
I look forward to weekends every week (how is it not Friday yet?). I feel like the weekends are when my soul is set free, with no work responsibilities, whatsoever. But then, weekends are only two days of the week. I can’t live my life waiting for only two days a week to happen. I need to live my life every single day of the week, or at least try to. So here is how I’m going to start working on my ideal life.
(This may be my most optimistic blog post yet, I’m not sure if it’s the tea I’m drinking or my sudden desire to just get out there and live my life a whole lot more, but please bear with me)
Make a list of things you enjoy doing
I love lists. I have lists everywhere. On my phone, on my laptop, on post-it notes, in notebooks, you name it. The last time I wrote a list of things I enjoyed doing was when I was sixteen, thinking if I should go to JC or Poly based on what I like (#lol). I actually found that list recently and it made me want to write a refreshed version of that list, ten years later.
When you’re writing this list of things you love doing, I hope you’d be true to yourself, or go all out, even. If you love binging Netflix or going to the zoo, write it all down, my friend. I think what’s important is to remember how you felt the last time you did those things. The last time you felt like you were being your most authentic self. The last time you felt genuinely happy. Think about it, what were you doing at that very moment?
Make a list of things that are getting in your way
There’s a good list… and there’s also a bad list. For our bad list, we are going to write down the things that are getting in our way. It could be time. Responsibilities. Money. The pandemic. Parents. Yourself. The list goes on. The whole idea of making this ‘bad’ list is not to depress or scare you, but it is to put things into perspective. It allows you to understand the things that are in your control and the things that are not.
A bonus to this list is to make a ‘compromise’ list. So let’s say, the last time you felt genuinely happy was when you were travelling, but sadly you can’t do that right now because of the pandemic. But perhaps, you could do something in your hometown that resembled what you did while you were travelling. It could be hiking, or going on a boat. It’s not the best, but at least it’s something. Another example is if you haven’t been able to cook or bake as much as you used to, and you really love cooking or baking, but you just haven’t found the time because you have a newborn or a new job. The compromise here is to squeeze in a little bit of time to do these things that you love. It could be once a week or a month, but it’s a lot better than nothing.
Live your dream life, one day at a time
Once you’ve gotten these lists out, you can start to plan out the things you’d like to do for yourself. The important part is to actually schedule these plans and MAKE THEM HAPPEN. Do it, not for anyone, but yourself. You can even make it a routine, and watch how you start getting excited about the little things again. It hasn’t been a smooth two years for most, but I realised that what keeps us going is feeling grounded in who we are as a person and doing the things we love. It keeps us sane, it keeps us happy. Perhaps our dream life isn’t being the richest or smartest person in the world. Perhaps it is just being the most authentic person we can be.
So if you’ve been feeling stagnant, wishing you could be somewhere else doing something else, this is probably a sign for you to actually make things happen. It might not have to be taking huge steps or being somebody completely different, but it could be doing a lot of the little things that you love or truly enjoy.
Go out there, make your dreams happen.
Watch as you become the best version of yourself.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Zahwah is a self-taught digital marketer, cupcake monster and enjoys writing in her free time.